21. Female. No talent. Internet access. What more could I ever ask for?

Hello my name is Splicer and I like to draw things. But lately I've been making a lot of Gifs.

Read my about and interests pages to make sure you really want to follow me.

My Steam account

My 3DS friend code: 4570-8506-5993

(Also, I'm American. Just FYI.)

If you see me tag something oddly, it means I'm doing it to respect followers who have Tumblr Savior.

The thing that I really hate about TS4 is that you don’t have custom color options for anything. That is such bullshit. If EA wont change it I hope someone will make a mod so you can.

posted 31 minutes ago; with 3 notes
tagged with .sims .sims 4 

perpetualvelocity:

for seventy goddamn dollars you’d think that Maxis would include some GODDAMN STORY PROGRESSION

YOU’D THINK THINGS WOULD WORK

YOU’D THINK YOU’D HAVE BABIES THAT FUNCTION, CHEATS THAT ARE GOOD, AND GENERALLY JUST. THINGS THAT NEED TO BE INCLUDED IN THE GAME THAT HAVE BEEN INCLUDED IN LITERALLY ALL THE SIMS GAMES UP TO THIS POINT

WHEN YOU SPEND

SEVENTY

DOLLARS

ON

A

GAME

WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU PEOPLE PAYING FOR HERE

I was a pretty disappointed when I downloaded today but what’s already there is good and with the amount of people complaining I’m sure they’ll fix at least *some* of the mistakes. I don’t think I’ll ever pre-order a game ever again, though. I should have learned my lesson with Dead Island.

posted 1 hour ago; via perpetualvelocity with 10 notes

While thinking about that elf bowling post I remembered that I used that as one of the main reasons when I begged my parents to get internet for our computer. “But all my friends are talking about this bowling game and we’ve already had our computer for years, please I want to play on the internet!” and it’s like… you’re a kindergartner. Go play with mud outside.

And then we got internet like a year later and all of us have spent every day on it since.

posted 1 hour ago; with 1 note
tagged with .Splicers life .ahh the great late 90s .a simpler and more boring time 

I love it when my mother says she hates rodents because then I can ruin her day by pointing out that bunnies are rodents and she almost always puts her hands over her ears and chants “I’m not listening, can’t hear you, shut up”

posted 1 hour ago;
tagged with .Splicers life 

calibore:

i gave in

posted 1 hour ago; via turbro (calibore) with 1,249 notes
tagged with .reblog .Invader Zim 
posted 1 hour ago; via usbdongle (pettypanda) with 622 notes
tagged with .reblog .card crucher .lmao I remember this .I still see traces of the template go around sometimes 
posted 1 hour ago; via death-by-lulz (sirchamallow) with 10,307 notes
tagged with .reblog .Hot Fuzz .fucking love this movie .fucking love this joke 

ego-x:

wednesdayaleen:

funeral—girl:

dbvictoria:

Add for German home improvement company shows dad doing something special for his goth daughter.

(x)

*cries all over rug*

I really like our advertising these days… :3

posted 1 hour ago; via ask-gallows-callibrator (dbvictoria) with 25,171 notes
tagged with .reblog .I'm actually crying .this is me and my dad .I love my dad so much 
sexyminion:

jim come get your damn land!

sexyminion:

jim come get your damn land!

posted 2 hours ago; via sexyminion with 7 notes
tagged with .reblog .sims 4 .I'm so sorry 

briangefrich:

kaanekii answered your post: Do I have any followers who were born …

ye

Allow me to tell you a story, child.

image

"Stay awhile and listen!"

Back around the time you were born, the Internet was a toddler too, and very little illustrates this like a game called Elf Bowling. This game from NStorm hit the web in 1998. Like many of the whack-a-mole games of that time, it was very simple and involved physical abuse.

In this case, Santa was bored and decided to go bowling, using his elves as pins while a reindeer watched.

image

The elves scream in high-pitched synchronized fear every time Santa bowls, and their crushed bodies are swept away into darkness by a giant squeegee.

image

Also, the game is really boring, like all bowling games.

Because the internet was still in diapers, of course it went completely viral in 1999.

And it kind of destroyed the Internet.

See, back in those days, most email users were using a program like Outlook Express to download messages to their computer.

image

This was before webmail was a thing. A majority of users at this time were still on dial-up (some were lucky enough to get a steady 56k connection, but many would be stuck at 33.6, or even worse, 18.8) and email systems were built to quickly move tiny text messages back and forth. A huge essay-like email to your mom explaining why you need more money? That’s a kilobyte or two in plain text and an email system blasts that out with no issues.

Elf Bowling is 1.1mb.

With a strong 56k connection, 1.1mb takes at least two and half minutes to download.

Outlook Express 5, which came with Windows 98, had a default server timeout of 60 seconds.

In 1999, everybody emailed it to everyone they know.

I was working as an internet tech support rep at the time, and here’s what happened:

  1. Elf Bowling would appear in your inbox on the server.
  2. You would attempt to download new messages.
  3. Everything before Elf Bowling would download fine.
  4. The server would time out trying to download the Elf Bowling file.
  5. The email would not be deleted from the server or marked as downloaded.
  6. Later on you’d try to get new messages and it would start to download Elf Bowling again, preventing new emails from getting through.

Eventually, it might download, or when you called tech support they had you increase the timeout, but then you’d play the stupid game and try to send it to every person you’ve ever met with an email address.

For the entire holiday season that year, email servers were under assault by this stupid game.

And that was only one half of the story. The file that was being sent around was elfbowling.exe.

People were downloading and running an unknown executable file.

Eventually, a chain email started going around, warning that elf bowling was a virus and it was going to delete all the information on your computer on Dec 25th at midnight, but this was determined to be a hoax.

There are two points here:

First off, fuck you, Elf Bowling

image

Secondly, kaanekii, marvel at where we have come in just your lifetime. I can watch Doctor Who streaming in HD on my phone, and just 16 years ago, one megabyte of Santa being a jackass almost destroyed the Internet’s email infrastructure.

image

I never played this but my friend told me about it. When I was in kindergarten.

posted 2 hours ago; via usbdongle (briangefrich) with 1,467 notes
tagged with .reblog .nostalgia .I'm so fucking old 

«